“The which means of life is simply to be alive.
It’s so plain and so apparent and so easy.”
Alan Watts.
However, after all, it’s not so easy, at the very least to most of us. Maybe particularly this time of 12 months after we are to: Lose 20 kilos! Be Higher Canine Folks! Work out! Eat extra kale! Be taught to Communicate Canine Like a Native! Be taught Chinese language! Be taught to Communicate Chinese language Canine!
Ah, however wait. What if simply being alive was sufficient? What if we use the start of a brand new 12 months to not “higher ourselves,” however to commit to easily and actually appreciating what we now have? It’s clear that that is one thing I’m engaged on myself . . . Wanting via previous 12 months’s “New 12 months’s” posts, I see a constant theme evolving: In January of 2024, I wrote about taking DELIGHT in even tiny issues. In 2023, I wrote about how do you wish to FEEL through the 12 months? I wrote about SAVORING particular moments in 2022, and having FEWER To Do lists on my 12 months’s To Do checklist of 2021.
I’d wager the farm (and I’ve one to placed on the desk), that I’m not alone in combating having simply BEING is sufficient, versus measuring ourselves by a set of accomplishments. That’s one of many causes that good friend and colleague Lynn Ungar’s latest Substack put up resonated so deeply once I learn it. Right here’s a piece of what she wrote:
What in case you approached the brand new 12 months not with gritted-teeth resolve, however somewhat with a way that you’re circling round one thing that issues, by no means fairly in the identical place, possibly a bit wobbly in the way you go, however related by an invisible thread that shapes your path? What would possibly change, tiny second by insignificant determination, in case you noticed your self as orbiting round Love or Freedom or Curiosity or Justice or Compassion or Creativity or Pleasure or Exploration or no matter star would possibly maintain you captive?
Lynn Ungar, Not resisters, Transformers.
It’s on this piece that Lynn suggests we take into account reVolution for the brand new 12 months, as a substitute of reSolution, however not in a name to arms type of means. Quite, within the sense that revolution additionally means to revolve round one thing. She asks: What will we wish to revolve round in 2025? I like, love this query!
I’ve contemplated this for a number of days, and have determined I wish to revolve round kindness. I wish to be somebody who sheds kindness like a Pyrenees sheds fur in spring, who sends tufts of it into the breeze like a dandelion. To be surrounded by a air-borne cloak of it like Pigpen in Peanuts. I’ll say that I consider myself as a usually, principally sort particular person, however that doesn’t imply I can’t do higher. I’ve my moments, simply ask Jim. And, like many, I’ve the toughest time being sort to myself. This doesn’t imply I don’t spoil myself with hours on the sofa with Maggie and Skip and Jim as therapists, and Netflix as leisure, to not point out chocolate . . . however nonetheless, I’m the Queen of Second Guessers, and could be exhausting on myself for not saying this, or for saying that when it was silly or unkind or unhelpful or actually silly . . . I do know I’m not alone on this, so how about we be as sort to ourselves as we’re our greatest mates?
(Necessary apart: Kindness doesn’t imply being weak when it’s worthwhile to be robust, or not preventing for what we imagine in. We are able to all be warriors after we should be, with kindness as our tenet.)
Right here’s yet one more factor I’m taking to coronary heart, this 12 months and hopefully in all years to come back; the recommendation of everybody’s favourite recommendation columnist (sure?), Caroline Hax, paraphrased as: In instances of hassle, Zoom in or Zoom out. Which means, somewhat than wanting on the regular view of life, suppose like a digicam, and focus, maybe, on one thing tiny like the colour or your favourite sweater, or your first sip of tea or espresso within the morning, or, these Zoomed in shut ups of Skip and Maggie.
Or go massive, and take a look at the celebs, or at a dawn, or your canine barely perceptible within the woods. Right here’s a photograph of that now.
Oh wait, it’s not, but it surely’s an opportunity to be sort to myself. I interrupted this for a bunch of appointments, got here again in to complete it, however wished to take Skip out earlier than darkish to work him on the sheep. My intention was to take my digicam out and get a shot of (as written above), a canine barely perceptible within the woods. Forgot the digicam. Actually needed to cease myself from saying “Trisha, you fool.” A triumph for at this time!
And, wait, all is properly, right here’s an identical shot of Skip within the woods from October, Zooming out:
I’ve discovered this Zoom in/Zoom out recommendation to be invaluable recommendation once I really feel overwhelmed. You?
All of us can assure that one thing goes to occur in 2025 that feels too too exhausting, or nearly too exhausting to deal with. I maintain this recommendation near me when these issues occur. Whereas surrounding myself, and my family members, with kindness.
I’m sending that kindness out to you all proper now–what a pleasure you all carry me! There’s a lot compassion and kindness in our village, I’m grateful for it daily.
MEANWHILE, again on the farm: It’s getting darkish and the canine have to eat and one thing much more necessary than my little farm occurred this weekend. Karen Pyror died on Saturday January 4, and if the earth didn’t cease spinning, it ought to have. It was Karen who took the science of studying out of the laboratory, and into the true world. First, coaching dolphins, then revolutionizing the world of canine coaching, and the branching out to the instructing of all species, together with the world’s most troublesome, us.
Someplace, I’ve a photograph of Karen and I collectively, however that’s one thing I can discover in my very own time, when the mud has settled. For now, thanks Wikipedia.
There’s no higher tribute to her than what’s discovered on the Karen Pryor Academy website, “Remembering Karen Pyror.” They are saying, and I agree wholeheartedly,
“Karen’s legacy lives on in each wagging tail, each joyful click on, and each second of connection shared between folks and animals.”
Relaxation in peace, pricey good friend, the celebs are fortunate to have you ever.
If you’re so inclined, inform us concerning the impact she has had in your life. And, in case you’re new to all this, learn up on her legacy, and the way she is chargeable for making your life, and the lifetime of the animals you like, so very significantly better.
